I thought I drunk dialed Adam last night and left him a voicemail. I just checked my phone. I realize I left a drunk voicemail with my son's teacher.
People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
Totally saw a hot amputee. I think this is called character growth.
I know he gets bloody noses a lot...so that explains all the blood...but I'd say the condoms are definitely from a penis.
I'm treating myself to a " uve slept with yet another mr. Wrong" breakfast
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I'm spoon feeding myself tequila for breakfast, should we skip class today?
Just slept with a female bodybuilder. not cute. but it was like fucking hulk hogan with a twat. Beastly.
im so disgusted with myself. funny thing was i lasted 15 seconds. she benches 325
I have chafed skin from the handy she gave me. I told her that and she said return the favor when it heals. I'm in love.
The perfect man would keep a whisky sour in my hand and give me endless sex. I really don't think that's too much to ask for.
if i seriously got my dick up last night, then im taking him to disney world cause thats just fuckin impressive
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
I love waking up to reeses ice cream. But I DONT love waking up to it all over my cat. I blame you.
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