ok so i jsut did the walk of shame with this random guy that i had sex with at the hotel party, and the lady at the front desk said "wow you're just now leavin?"
i was just outside smoking and i saw a hooker sing "i wish i knew who your daddy was" to her new born baby. someone explain to me why i ever left chicago to go to college...
bitch asked me if i cared if she kept her snuggie on while we had sex
and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
Overdraft my account again. Parents are starting to ask questions. What would go over better a gambling or drug addiction??
I think its pretty common. 1 out of every 4 people probably have a stripper's phone # in their phone.
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
What's the procedure for answering a booty call from someone under house arrest?
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
Laziness has hit a new level. I'm out of clean sexy underwear and meeting a boy tonight so I'm having a thong delivered via post mates.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
She was screaming and crying about how she couldn't find her middle finger. Then, she threw her body on to the pavement. Thats the last time we buy a freshmen a handle.
So, is Canada considered an excessive distance to go for a booty call? Asking for a friend...
Randomize