Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
is it bad that the only reason i knew what antidote meant in class today, was from years of playing pokemon?
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
his penis was the training wheels of my sex life
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
Please call me back as soon as your phone is charged, if you die tonight I don't want the last thing I said to you to be "I just farted a little"
college stoner meal of the day: microwaved nutrigrain bars
I know everybody has skeletons in their closet but why are all of mine so slutty?
I WILL BE THE BEST FICTITIONAL HISTORICAL FIGURE FOR THE FEMENIST MOVEMENT THE WORLD HAS EVER SEEN
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
I'm trying to seductively eat these M&M's to let her know its on
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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