it's like everything I expected to see tonight all put together in one at once
that is the greatest description ever
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
I denied three guys and puked everywhere because I love you.
Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend. I woke up at 7 this morning to drive your mistake home because you wouldn't get up.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
On monday, while we were having crazy monkey sex, I earned $82. Vacation pay rocks.
We got back from Mcdonalds and literally 5 minutes of being in your room, you wanted to go back because "We haven't been yet."
She wanted me to watch her masterbate and after she thanked me for a wonderful evening and left. This state is weird.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
In honor of today being Sunday I am day drinking and watching Grey's Anatomy all day. ALL DAY.
She looks well worn, presumably from a cavalcade of penis.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I didn't even get crazy off of the coke so everything's fine. Also, I think I might have killed my aunt's dog..
Randomize
