i only hope i can top last weeks sext session
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
Just did the walk of shame across state lines...milestone?
flashcards smell like vodka and my textbook is in the toilet. ready for the final
We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
This taco party has no tacos, just a hot asian guy in booty shorts. We were lied to.
And my coffee table looks like something out of Scarface
she's sitting there like the lesbian godfather. A cigarette in one hand and a titty in the other.
Had to decide between a hook up at the train restroom or getting to work on time #growingup
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
People are talking politics and I have had 9 mimosas
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I think I had Hypothermia but was too drunk to notice.
Randomize
