8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
I should never bitch about not getting laid. He's begging me to come over and I'm saying no because I'm watching a Golden Girls marathon.
He fucked my earring out of my ear. Of course he's coming over again.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
If I was gonna be at your campus for halloween weekend, I'd dress up as the masked horny fairy and give out condoms. I'm so thoughtful.
can i text him and be like "oh yeah, forgot i kinda made out with a girl this weekend. For future reference, does this count as cheating?" ?
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
My Captain America poster fell down. Cap is disappointed in my life decisions.
I just need you to stay far enough away that I can't smell your cologne. I completely forget that I fucking hate you as soon as I smell it.
The highlight of the trip was definitely my dad telling me that I "used to be his prettiest daughter."
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
Ignore him I am the one that wears the pants in the relationship while "the big man" cries in bed
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