i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
Something growled at me in your dark backyard last nt. Hoping it was my landwalking laser sharks and not Andy.
my history teacher totally just suggested that we record his lectures and play drinking games with them later so that we pay attention to the material.
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
You passed out across the stairs with your feet and arms through the railings so you "wouldn't fall down when you blacked out and no one could get the pizza past you without waking you up". \n\nYou're the smartest drunk I know.
she was eating donuts out of the garbage. enough said.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
So. She dumped me today.
Well, maybe you shouldn't have referred to going down on her as "Dumpster-Diving".
It was my little brother's 14th birthday today. Didn't know what to get him so I just showed him how to use incognito tabs on google chrome.
Would it be wildly inappropriate for me to tailgate a Jonas brothers concert?
I just found a voice recording from Tanya's bachelorette party when we found you drunk in downtown being harassed by a crazy dude dressed like a clown and we rescued you. Attached is a voice recording of me interviewing you after we found you. I titled it Carlos Batman.
but, alas, I am not the lady in the streets. I'm simply the freak in the sheets.
I only get hit on by people going through their midlife crisis. Yes, I did purposely write that gender neutral.
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