Enough with studying for finals. Time to put that my little pony coloring book to use.
The world would be so much better with thought bubbles.
eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
Must be January. Theres a fat chick on an elliptical wearing khaki capris. Someone doesnt own any workout clothes
she woke up, said "please dont tell me your name, i dont want to remember it"
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
My mom just sent me this: "I like Jon, but he needs to be the one going down on you! Yeah, we saw your head pop up in your car last night."
He just jumped up off the couch, screamed "ITS OVER NINE THOUSAND!" And then attempted to fly out the window like a bird. I don't know nor do I care to know what just happened
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
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