My brain says no but my pants say off.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
Did you put 9lbs of birdseed all over my car?
You weighed it?
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
I just had my first boner in 64 days today....glad to find out my fluids are still pumpin
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
there’s plenty of nice guys out there with good jobs and NO felonies!
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Yes. I'm realizing that sports games are good reasons to drink. I just cheer when everyone else cheers.
He played Harry Potter Fan Fiction videos to get me in the mood. He might be the one.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Never joke about your clitoris.
Randomize
