i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
The world would have a new energy source if someone would just take a blacklight to the backseat of that slut's car
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
Last time we had an ultimatum like that, things went very far south. I'm down, but it's your turn to wake up in a hospital.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
If everything else in my life fails, at least I just had one of my top orgasms
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Have you ever been so drunk you pass out in the cab and everyone goes inside and forgets about you? I have
I just ate apple sauce in my underwear. This isn't 30. This is 3.
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Randomize