Nothing says "You're all grown up now" like setting up your 401k with shitty underwear.
he called you a drunk bob the builder and you proceeded to explain how you were going to build ramps throughout the house
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
you kept telling her you'd make a great step-dad while cuddling her and rubbing her back...
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
Dont care what i do tnt just as long as i get to chug a beer in somebodys face
His penis could choke an elephant. A baby elephant... But an elephant non the less.
You what they say. One dick in the hand is better than two in the bush
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
there's crying, and people are upset, and there's a love triangle, and a broken heart, and so much estrogen
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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