So the hot 23 year old i went home with last night is really 17 and was here for orientation.. i feel like a pedifile...
In that case, you should probably come up to the union, orientation is in full swing, your kind of guys ;)
cunt.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
i'm writing my speech about my 4th grade backstreet boy concert experience. that sums up how seriously i take my life.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i came out of the bathroom and he had christmas lights wrapped up his leg, around his boner, and down the other side
I stole a road cone for their 13 yr old son. Apparently I told him to put Christmas lights on it, and "treat her like a lady."
Please don't tell me I was shouting "I'm bleeding from my vagina" in front of my ex-boyfriend and his new girlfriend.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I think I sprained my soul last night
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
Don't do anything I wouldn't do. Thankfully for you that list does not include male models.
You make any dick jokes involving sushi and there WILL be consequences.
Sushi is fucking sacred in this house and I will kill you if you try and taint that.
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
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