How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
So im at the gym and some guy has a tattoo of a hand doing the shocker... The douche bag bar has been raised yet again.
He was putting purell on my boobs saying "they need to be clean for later." He hadn't had a drink all night
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
I'm not really into her personality. Not that we've ever looked for personality in women.
That's only a quality to look for in a second marriage.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Pretty sure I just puked up sand. And nothing else.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
And then god smiled down upon me and he said let there be hangover food and let it be Wendy's
he pissed the bed, like I literally woke up and he was pissing right beside me. With the electric blanket he's lucky he didn't get electrocuted
she used her teeth again, but this time it was out of love
my sex drive just dried up, fell out, and is rolling on the floor somewhere.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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