How many nights a week you wake up with sticky boxers cause you were dreaming of Clay Aiken? Your wife mad?
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
i have one question about last night
if this is about your fridge being filled with hotdogs, sour cream, and PB&J open-faced sandwiches, i can explain
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
It's cool, I power napped on the dryer while they were fucking in the bathroom so I'm good to go now. Where are you?
Do you think kicking my coke habit is a good personal goal to put down on the evaluation form?
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
no strings attached, like you could fuck him and then throw him off a building right after
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
What are best friends for?
Picking your clothes up from a one night stand you had nearly 2 months ago
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
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