So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
You really need to take down the pics of you and your boyfriend on facebook. It's becoming increasingly harder to jerk off while i'm Facebook stalking your pics at 2am.
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
So does it count as really great road-head if he ran over 3 mailboxes before realizing he was off the road?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I just pictured ballsacks being shoveled into the furnace of the Titanic.
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
He has a beach house and a Simba tattoo. Our wedding is next Tuesday, hope you're free.
I'm in my math teacher's garage hiding right now because I fucked his son last night. It's fine
i think we sleep fucked last night...
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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