And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
Thanks for sticking it out with old horseface last night... I owe you one buddy.
There's two girls at the bar sniffing each others boobs.
It wouldn't have been a big thing. If anything, I woulda apologized to you and cleaned the remote
I'm okay with corrupting his young mind.
Ew! He's just a child!
AND I'M GONNA SHOW HIM HOW TO MAKE ONE.
I just ran into the married chick you banged 2 years ago at our apt! She asked me if I could get her coke! Memories bro. Memories
Then he kept saying sentences and ending them all with "the point of no return" even if it didn't make sense, and kept telling this other guy he wouldn't be his "wife son"
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
Well, you've continued the theme of living with people who's dicks I've sucked.
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
I'm laying backwards. On the stairs. Eating carrots. And drinking from a captain Morgan bottle.
I’m not washing my pussy with handsoap.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
