My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I realized that I earned the name Classy cassie as i was throwing up vodka slushie in my bed with a guy I know by the name extacy boy
You were rubbing your foot on one of your legs and kept saying, "My sock feels like a waterslide!"
I'm being an old woman and getting trashed in a night gown in public...of course it's going to be fun
BTW the amount of schmoozing I am doing towards some guy for an ID that may or may not look like you... You better love me.
Actually I more feel like I'm on a ship about to grab the holy grail off an island
The ship is me being high the holy grail is some profound idea I'm about to have
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
your life is not complete until you watch a gaggle of murderous clowns dance to gangnam style.
also, what is the correct term for a shit ton of clowns?
Someone fucked a stripper in their rental car, there is goddamn glitter everywhere.
It got to the point where I was so drunk, playing rock paper scissors as a drinking game seemed like a good idea.
It's a race to see if I finish the bottle first or my homework
Let's get this straight. I am six fucking feet tall. Do you even understand how limited my options in guys to date are? No. Did you see my last three boyfriends? I looked like a fucking giant next to them. So I will fuck this six-foot-seven Italian model even if I am the ugliest girl at this party because, goddammit, I deserve to.
Randomize
