her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
the nurse was shocked when I handed her a cup of green piss. what did she expect giving me a drug test on st. patty's day?
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
for the record, you never really realize how drunk you still are until you get on rollerskates...
ahhhh just came to creep and you're not there AND your thong you were wearing last night is on the floor..someone has some explaining to do
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
What happened to my face?
You kneed yourself in the eye during the Harlem Shake.
It was impressive.
just found out that she named her cat after me.
you got to sleep with him and don't even remember it? that's like sleeping through an entire vacation
Omg my orgasm just made the fucking sun come out. Clearly my libido controls the weather now.
Randomize
