My new apartment is within walking distance of both the liquor store and the chinese buffet. This is either going to be my worst life choice ever or my best.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
On a scale of 1 to last weekend, how hungover are you?
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
Ladies, we have an appointment at David's Bridal aurora this coming Sunday at 3pm. And an appointment at where ever tequila is served at noon.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
She trust falled out of a window. It was like that scene from A Little Princess but with a lot more blood.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
You're alright. You just passed out while we were having sex. Then I'm pretty sure you peed. So I went home.
She actually purred while I was balls deep in her! I have never been so proud to buy plan b at 6:30 in the morning.
YOU CANT FOOL THE TOILET
i guess i fuck people who own bucket hats so i can't talk shit
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
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