In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
I've never watched DWTS before, but this show's got Pamela Anderson, Erin Andrews and Brooke Burke: 3 of my top 10 all time most masturbated to women.
Shes been standing with her arms crossed in front of the mirror for 45 minutes...she told me she's "getting sober"
I've decided to be proactive and make a sex playlist on my phone to avoid any awkward moments in my upcoming slutty summer
I'm such a fucking super-fan. I was worried his cum would wash away his autograph.
she used teeth so i didnt tell her when i was cumming ...........dont get mad get even
I was talking to another guy at the bar last night and all of a sudden a flying piece of Sausage lands on my boobs. Then I hear my boyfriend yell, "just marking my territory."
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
chasing tequila with frosting. best baby shower ever.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
i was so blazed last night that i kept imagining a talking eagle sitting next to me encouraging me to smoke more... i listened to it.
Randomize
