I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
today was the first day of rush. talking to girls all day makes me sick of having a uterus.
Someone woke me up and gave me a sprite and some pills. I put them in my belly button. Trust no one.
I miss eating meals at a table and having unprotected sex..
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
I really really need to have and out of body experience just so I can talk to myself about this shit that I'm doing with my life.
I'm warming McDonald's pies on my heater cause I'm too high for the microwave.
He called me baby cakes during sex... Can U not
pretty sure I blew his mind with the sex last night. He repaid me with a five minute conversation about power rangers.
He compared my ass to "a 13 year old track star's ass." Umm WTF? Is that supposed to be a compliment? And when I questioned boy or girl he said "either."
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
When he said he lived in a closet I thought he meant his room was really small or something... But he actually has a queen size mattress on the floor of his roomates walk-in closet.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
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