Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
I'm trying this new thing, it's called standards
Make note: the first date is too soon to make the "condoms are only for making balloon animals" joke.
sorry we overslept. have a good day at work. p.s. thanks for making it feel like my vagina got hit by a train.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
Remind me in the morning that I've now seen a guy do crack. That actually happened. I'm at the wrong party.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
If she "comes out" to me I guess I'll high five her. That's pretty much my response to everything these days.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
We went from him going down on me to swapping baby pictures of our moms.
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
I came so hard my ears popped.
Bitch how dare you drink my dos equis
Randomize
