Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
He tried. I said no. He said, "It's ok if I do this?" and proceeded to jerk himself off. Oh, the French.
Me and my vagina aren't speaking at the moment.
Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face. Dick in my face.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
You can achieve whatever you wish in your imagination with some help from drugs
The resort was totally empty, just June and I. Which of course lead to EXCESSIVE day drinking and outdoor fucking. FYI Dominicans LOVE to watch.
I call him Seabiscuit because he's my trusty steed
I just ate cream cheese straight for my dog
I'm afraid to ask what that means
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
Did you pee in the oven last night??
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Be careful, there is sex in the air.
Ok. After that I think I'm going to drag queen jello wrestling if you would care to join.
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