So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
He is drunkenly eating my teddy grahms and making little growling noises as he bites the head off of each one.
the last thing i remember is unlocking the door. its like i was literally opening the door to my blackout
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I think they're German
Just say lederhosen and see what happens
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
Explain to me how we're not being documented on? A gynecologist I saw two times 8 years ago popped up on my people you may know list on fb. What in the actual fuck?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
I thought this boy told me to choke him, so I went all in. Turns out he really said “stroke.”
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