oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
Don't tell me wow. Tell me this is normal for college and in no way am I a whore.
He told me his penis would be a "Sad Panda" if I didn't give it a ride through the jungle.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
They turned motor-boating me into some kind of sick game
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
And we just chatted casually as i peed on the floor and she peed in the toilet
holy fucking shit get me out of here. even the babies are wearing beanies
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
fuck you
also please return my underwear, they were one of my favourite pairs xo
All I remember thinking is, why the fuck are there martians on the ceiling? And they were riding fruit. Like strawberries and shit.
Dude I just woke up with a dog sleeping on me.
I thought you didnt have a dog??
Exactly.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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