Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
you'll be horrified to know he's visiting next weekend
You two are a rollercoaster of sex and silence.
I may or may not have had sex last night then sent him home on a bike with two flats
In other news there is a guy at my office who I'm pretty sure will be wearing someone's skin as a coat one day.
I don't want to flatter myself but after the way he was looking at me today I think it might be me.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
I was unconscious Saturday for like 6 hours after I passed out on the sidewalks of our nation's capital. Thank you America, for bottomless brunch.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
But no. So do not give him one damn penny. Unless they are in a sock and you are hitting him with it.
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Did u puke in a church parking lot? And go to the wrong funeral yesterday? Lol
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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