I left a bag of circus animal cookies in my car all day. they melted together into on giant cookie. this could either be the best or worst thing ever
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
I was fingering her, she was moaning, and we were singing Mulan
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
will barter weed for kareoke machine...
I remember three things: you falling down an entire flight of stairs, me stripping out of your Christmas one-sie to do cartwheels in my underwear, and people standing above me saying, "where did that bump on her head come from?"
Also, I was told I kept the antlers on the entire time. I'm deeming last night a success.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
Finally buying a camera. Missed out on recording a 3way last night. Hindsight. Ugh.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
are you just sitting in your hotel room drinking popsicle vodka?
.....well anything sounds bad when you say it like THAT
fell down stairs ended up in underground bar now im dancing with trannies and best night of my life. lines of coke
Randomize
