Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Just saw a man in a wheel chair using his feet to push himself backwards through a crosswalk... good morning Atlanta
just upgraded from jello shots to jello bowls blacking out just got that much more delicious
Tell her to not eat the pizza she threw up on.
Dude you picked up her Chihuahua and threatened to kill it yelling "it's not cinco de mayo, bitches"
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking if you had a pulse
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
Vacuum the place before you go out of town there are random glitter cocks everywhere
Actually we have similar relationship styles aka no relationship... it could work
No no no, work drunk and day drunk are totally different. I got drunk with a client and made a huge sale at 1pm. You are still in your PJs and jacking off.
Would you be opposed to me keeping a live lobster in the shower for a bit?
Randomize
