I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
she kept calling me pablo. i just went with it.
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
Just please never masturbate in my bed again. I'm burning my sheets as I write this.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
The school security guard knows my name.... I think I'm missing some memories...
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
At least your road beer policy is responsible. Well, relatively speaking.
your keys are upstairs on the nightstand or I put them in the hole in the wall
I'd like to have a moment of silence for all the dicks she's broken off
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
Remember when you laughed that I downloaded a “fireplace” station on my Roku? I just woke up butt naked on my couch with my fireplace station playing. So there, guess that shows you. Now excuse me while I go back to sleep in front of my fireplace.
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