i think guys can sense when i'm not wearing underwear
mom took my condoms, found one in the trash the next day
I know she was great
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
Matt is in the hospital again. the night nurse text me asking not to bring the boombox again. is it sad or awesome that they are starting to know us?
You realize at the bar last night we blew on imaginary whistles like rose from titanic right?
OMG HIS EYES ARE POOLS OF SEX. HOT SEX.
Nothing says "I mean business" like using a cart at the liquor store.
While running home from the bar in high heels I multi- tasked and sexted with Brent. Jesus.
I will forever remember this as The Great Jalepeno Cock Burn of 2014.
Just ate an entire BBQ chicken pizza this better go to my tits
You tell anyone I'm rocking out to Pitbull in an economy, base-model car, I'll kill you.
He's very cute and has a totally sit-able face.
Hey can you send me a pic of your breast with a peace sign in the photo? I'm trying to win a scavenger hunt contest. Thanks so much
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
I feel like i'm being yelled at when you type in all caps.Did you just have bad sex?
Randomize
