I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
He just left - my room smells like that cheese they put on nachos and cigarettes and beef
Yo quero taco bell
Dude sorry i couldnt seem to spell any words right in the texts i sent you last night
I felt like a fucking code breaker.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
My dad is complaining about how his computer keeps getting viruses. I don't have the heart to tell him he needs to stop downloading so much porn.
I give him blow jobs while he watches sports.. how am I not his gf yet??
Guy passed out in the lobby with a keychain sharpie hanging from his belt loop. 1 guest came in and wrote on him, then others saw and got in line. I'm not waking him up.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
I woke up while eating peanut butter from a jar. I don't think I should be social today.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
I walked in..crop dusted the whole place then asked her if she wanted to go to a place that smells better.
You were always a thinker
I almost just opened my door to get my pizza butt ass naked
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