i just borrowed 5 dollars from my eight year old sister. i'm at a new low
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
Your my favorite hello and hardest goodbye.
And I especially mean that last part, half the time you pass out somewhere and it is impossible to get you to leave.
I was trying not to text you this weekend, so I deleted your number when I was sober. Then auto restore at midnight. It was like drunk magic
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
He blacked out at the first bar and passed out at the second...we just carried him to bar three and four and sat him in the lounge chairs, he said we're amazing
so far I've only met her once and hung out one other time. Up to 5 BJs already. That's serious efficiency.
The best part is every argument that she makes from here on out will be refuted by "Oh hey remember that time you shit yourself wearing someone else's sweatpants at a frat party?"
I'm 22 and I'm drinking hawaiian punch from a sippy cup. Everything is right in the world.
Your bf is wearing nothing but a cape, I mean absolutely NOTHING but a cape. I know you said he looks like Thor but this is getting a bit ridiculous.
Randomize
