Do you ever look back at facebook pics and say, "are those really guys I had sex with?"
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
Wydf in so deruk i just dowwned a packet if salt waitibg for food at del taco
So many lesbians keep hitting on me. I'm about to give up and just go home with the manliest one.
Worst bachelorette party. She got smashed and cried because she thinks she might have herpes from when she cheated on him. Not looking good for them.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
Our first crop came in on the day that they added Hercules to Netflix Instant, I think it's the universe telling us that it approves of us growing shrooms in our guest room.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
I’m glad they have a happy marriage but why do they have to inflict it on the rest of us?
Ive completely stopped wearing makeup. Not even eyebrows. Thats how sick of wisconsin I am.
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