Do you think the new Crest Whitestrips Advance Seal would stay on while I give him head? It would be great to knock out 2 things at once...
I think we were cool up until the point where he saw that planned parenthood was on my speed dial.
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
corn on the cob and anal lube are not substitutes for the real thing
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Breaking up as roommates was a poor life decision. I'm sorry. Thank you for never shitting on the floor.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
ah lol cocaine is strange when I dose I feel like an elephant running through a grocery store
I admit I fucked your best friend, but to be fair, you fucked the tristate area. So there's a good chance about 40% of those people are MY friends.
Randomize
