Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
My doctor literally wrote on the script NO SEX
You seriously looked at the house acorss the street and implied that you thought they had nice Easters.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
No. If you are gonna end this, you are gonna do it right. Not by getting bombed and falling on a strange penis. That was the old you.
She just cut the six pack plastic up and screamed "save the dolphins"..she also threw away cans of tuna. I like this girl.
I just made SCOTCHSICLES. no further info is necessary
You should kill a bro for me and drag his carcass home so I can study him.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
The smell of pee and coconut conditioner still makes me think of him
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