why doesnt he love me? i have tried everything. i even sang to him after sex.
you have got to be kidding?
u just dont fucking get it...you try and cum while your cat is staring at you.
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
We already established this. No, he did not cum on the dog.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
I'll probably just lay on my couch bra-less sipping wine out of a straw so I don't have to lift my head.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
Yo I found your batman costume.... It was in my pool with a shitload of beer cans
I just conducted a skype meeting drunk and in the middle of a cornfield. I don't even think they noticed.
Don't even start with me. You know damn well if you walked into a bathroom with two girls naked in the shower you would stay too. Regardless how drunk I was or whether or not you were my ride.
You suck at answering, but you did manage to avoid a fun conversation about hemorrhoids. So maybe you're great at answering.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
So I definitely fucked a guy while holding on to his pigtails like reigns last night.
The most literal cowgirl position ever.
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
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