This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I dont have enough money in my bank account to buy a pregnancy test. this wouldnt be the first time ive had to steal one either...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
He equated my biology degree to a belief in Santa. I wonder if he heard the doors to my vagina clanging shut.
Hes pre-made beer lollipops so he "can suck before the sex" QUOTE!
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
That sad moment when you flush your Molly down the toilet at the airport & watch your vacation slowly end..
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
The stock is going waaaaay up on that picture of my pussy with a bowtie on it.
Ah, but I don't wear underwear. Every day is Commando Wednesday.
Nana saw my nipple rings & made me watch Joel Osteen all morning
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Randomize
