Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
If I were trying to take advantage of you I would have maxed out all your credit cards by now.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
A baby just go on our party bus. What. The. Fuck.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
Also I think he would slowly, painfully, die. You really can't live without a penis. You'd explode.
I like to play this game where I try to reach orgasm before my bathtub overflows....lost tonight.
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
She apologized again the next day. I said it was pee under the bridge
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
i just had diarrhea that people from the 1930's would have died from
How’s your Christmas Eve so far?
I just chased my melatonin with red wine. It’s 12:00pm.
So drunk last night I reviewed my recent anazon purchase of secret deodorant. Trust me, it was eloquent.
Randomize
