Its sad we have to plan out fun a month in advance. 30 sucks.
I didnt expect it either. But she was there and I had a boner, so i made it happen.
Hes still not moving. At what point does 'hungover' become 'hospital-time?'
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
hey quick question, what would you consider to be a "first date" porn?
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I stirred my drink with a butcher knife. His roomate keeps giving me dirty looks
Like what do you want from me
She had an asthma attack and had to stop but insisted on getting me off. It's official she's the one
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
well you did quote socrates while playing beer pong and then proceeded to fall down
Randomize