Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Covered in glitter and dick. 2010 feels a lot like 2009.
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
he smelled like listerine and beef tacos
Sorry I didn't wanna double team his sister. Having whiskey dick and watching you get laid didn't sound appealing
he had a dikembe mutombo jersey on, was swatting peoples drinks out of their hand and wagging his finger in their face everytime he did it.
Someone shattered a urinal.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Did my good deed for the day.. Helped an old guy hide his beer on the NJ transit while the ticket lady came by
He answered his phone while he was eating me out and proceeded to yell at his wife for interrupting lunch...impressed or rock bottom?
I can't help but feel like we would be friends still if my phone didn't always capitalize BUTTLOAD...
I heard drunk is the new sober. I heard me say that. To a cop. Can you come get me??
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
