i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
There's a fat drunk walrus bitch here next to me and shes already puked and now falling on herself
OH FUCK NOW HER BOYFRIEND IS MAKING OUT WITH HER VOMIT HOLE
Sounds like a good blink 182 concert...
So I decided to start saving money for my abortion in a tomato sauce jar because it says ‘Prego.’ I know I thought it was fucking genius!
apparently drunk me likes to play hide the puke.. was not a fun time washing all my legos.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
Don't get the hula weed. It makes you sleep walk in destructive and confusing ways. I'll explain on Saturday.
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
I hijacked a bellboy cart and rolled into the party dancing on it
Just orgasmed in traffic. Starting to have feelings for my commute.
it's graduation. he's gonna get congratulations slash emotional i cant believe youre leaving me sex.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
I just realized I'm currently not eating carbs, drinking alcohol or having sex. 2014 is off to a horrible start.
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
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