last night i found where hot topic managers go to die after they get fired.
i am not listening to taylor swift on a pink ipod. totally not happening.
I knew you were drunk when you poured scotch on a croissant and ate it.
I made $300 today by selling pizza @ $4 a slice to nerds who refuse to leave the library. God I love finals time
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
I hope your sleeping good cuz when u wake up im punching you square in the face
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Dear awkwardly drunk roommate, thanks for stuffing enough change in my clevage that I could afford a pepsi at work today. Sincerely awesome roommate that put up with your drunk ass
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
They invented a new game at work. Its called guess if I'm baked, hungover, drunk, or some combination of the three. Its surprisingly very difficult..
As long as you don't want to make a shrine out of my eyelashes It's all good
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
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