My room smells like vodka and shame
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
This girl would not stay down. It was like night of the living dead. She kept on rising up to haunt anything with a penis
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
White grape blunt wraps are like the equivalent of a glass of wine in a tux.
The sign say "Kereoke" strip bar. 5 more beers and ill be ready to rumble.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
he has the ass of a greek god and he made me breakfast
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I puked into my skirt and then had to carry it to the bathroom and dump it out, Lmfao and it was like 2pm
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Right?? Give me some apple scented candles and I'm a fall wet dream
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