found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
She offered to make me a fruit roll up salad for breakfast...I'm not sure if that's the coolest or weirdest thing ever...
i might have gotten away with it if "don't tase me bro!" wasn't the first thing i said when i rolled down my window.
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
Also I feel like 60% of our relationship is based on sausage mcmuffins.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
I NEVER left your party last night of anyone asks.
Yeah, I didn't wake up handcuffed to my bed either.
I'm just gonna use that pot butter as dip for chips. That's fat, American AND stoner!
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
In that state of mind I managed to bounce back from getting hit by a golf cart and convince an investigations officer that I was okay to go into the game.
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
She stripped naked and ran around the outside of the house while I stood by the tent holding her clothes shouting "come back" because I was too drunk to chase her. This is why we can't have nice things.
No. I don't like you. I like your penis. Chin up. At least I like part of you.
Randomize
