I'm totally gay for Miss Californiaaaaaa
oh sweet, sweet irony
I hope that the reason I've been psycho on him is that I'm pregnant and not just psycho.
We lost the cork forthe wine, so we used a tampon as a replacement. I never loves tampons so much
EMERGENCY: IS A KAREOKE RICKROLL ACCEPTABLE IN THE YEAR 2011?
So i forgot that my head is completely wrapped in gauze, and tried to do the "come hither" look. He think's i'm brain damaged
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
I don't remember much but I think I'm wearing your underwear, and for that, I am extremely grateful.
She's calming us down by shoving oreos in our mouths
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Well, I guess you are not meant to have this fucking picture of an adorable baby duck.
There's no time frame.
For drinking wine out of the bottle and taking nyquil at 9 AM? There probably should be.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
Randomize
