did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
Referring to yourself in third person during sex is apparently an instant turn off
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
Qdoba locked their bathrooms last night.. I suppose so people didn't pee all over them? I considered it counter productive considering I just peed on the outside of their building then. I had to pee
An hour is enough time for me to get drunk and win a dry hump marathon so I hope you have somewhat similar or better goals
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
My sister texted me to say she just found a corn on the cob in her purse from last night. You need to party with us more.
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
LOL he's a hopeless romantic now? 🤔 I'd say giving him a bj in a freakin softball dugout isn't the most romantic thing but it still happened
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
So I hung out with an australian but woke up with a British man in my bed does that make me culturalized
Randomize
