we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
Just saw a group of asian tourists in safari outifts bow in thanks to the starbucks guys. And no Im not high.
i love insurance, just had an iv with 4 bags of fluid, 2 shots of finagrin and a 2 hour nap . woke up without a hangover. all for $20
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Urine might work for jellyfish stings, but we found out it doesn't work well for nose bleeds...
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Also, putting laundry hampers on my head and pretending I'm an astronaut is a good way to get caught in every door frame in the house.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
There's hot sauce all over my mirror, lamp shade and dresser. Also it's your turn for weed
I don't know. She kept pirouetting across the kitchen while making dinner. I just sat there stoned.
I think he knows I took a picture of him. Why I don't get punched in the face more often is anyone's guess.
You opened the door to your apartment and shrieked "THE CHAIR IS GONE!" then punted a bag of votive candles
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
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