We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
fuck that im pissed. when I come back im ripping forskin off.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
ok so I've decided, new penis Thursday (formally known as new people Thursday) will need to be put on hold next week in preparation for Friday
Memorial weekend is the following week genius. New penis Thursday countdown has already begun.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
As part of the off-hours team building exercises, I had my new coworkers figure out to push me back to the hotel from the nearby bars in a shopping cart every night for a week.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
the quiet that you are hearing is a silent suggestion that you should go fuck yourself
This couple is walking their pig around campus
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
Now I’m honestly wondering if I took this kids virginity
I’m really regretting these suede pants.
Randomize
