i'm at a party where swedish girls are dumping laundry detergent on each other because it glows in blacklight. this is awesome
He just kept muttering to himself "stabby stabby stabby stabby" while we were boning. I will never be boning him again.
I just called my cat a slut and she responded. Proudest moment ever.
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
I couldn't sleep so I drunk ellipticaled for an hour. Worst. Idea. Ever.
It started out just like any other night: was watching a Zach Effron movie, drinking tequila out of a water bottle. I don't understand how this got out of hand.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Just FYI....you totally yelled out Royals while we were having sex last night lol.
You are the epitome of what awesome would taste like.
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
