i just wanna skin you and wear you like last years versace.
you may have the big hair, fake nails, and talk with a fake accent, but you will NEVER be a housewife from new jersey so STOP TRYING.
shes about as inviting as chlamydia
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
He's stoned as shit, eating breakfast cereal and taking a dump. All while listening to dubstep. We may never understand him.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
Would you have sex with a guy wearing a Batman mask?
It's all hypothetical, I don't have a Batman mask... yet...
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
If you think hives from an allergic reaction to lube is funny, remind me to tell you the story about how I got a black eye from masturbating.
I'm not trying to analyze you I'm just saying you are being unfair to soup
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
I miss painting strippers for Christmas. Holidays not the same without glitter and body paint
I'll be your substitute stripper tonight.
Randomize
