I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Will give head in exchange for a Netflix password. Serious inquiries only please.
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Dude I bought tampons with cardboard applicators by accident and now I know my vagina hates the 1960s
I just remembered that before we left my house I vowed to stay fully clothed and I FAILED
There’s a stripper dressed like a slutty pilgrim. Is that a thing?
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