You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
yes he's amazing in bed. he made me like, black out. everything went black it was weird. so yes, i'd fuck him again. plus, he has every season of buffy on dvd
Calling yourself a modern day Geisha doesn't justify being a whore.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
We ran out of ice cubes so I used ice cream. Everyone thought that was the plan all along. I just went with it.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
Literally the only clue I have to try and figure out my blackout adventures is a draft on twitter that just says "Mummies alive!"
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
This bitch goes out driving during the nor'easter to get her ass eaten.. that’s dedication
Ever find a porn video so groundbreaking you mentally cancel all your Dick Appointments for the week?
Randomize