shaved balls and baby powder=awesome
Just witnessed a fat girl fall off the treadmill, pop a medicine ball, and drink coke out of a water bottle all in one workout.
i just saw some one pass a baby through the drive-thru window at dairy queen.
She refered to her bed as the "cockpit"....I understand that this morning.
Now they're talking about doing whiskey shots since they're flipping the turkey over. You might need to drive me home.
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
You thanked me for a delicious cock and tacos...
It's 11:50 on Friday the 13th. There's a full moon. AND the bride to be just puked on herself while getting a lap dance from a stripper named...wait for it....LUCKY. Is this real life?
Other than unclothed paranormal encounters, how has your day been
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
no offense but you looked like shit yesterday
tequila is unforgiving..
I have a whole new respect for her. She chugged half a bottle of jack daniels, and then peed all over his wall. Serves him right.
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