Every time we have sex I can't stop thinking about Jesus
oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
and in the morning, while we were eating breakfast, she was all " i think someone sneezed into my shirt..." she'll never know.
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
i slept with her, drove her to her sisters house to babysit, and then drove around the block where i met her sister and had sex with her in my van. I'm family Friendly!
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
she had no gag reflex. and is an abercrombie model. i love college.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
It is officially settled in my mind that fuck the hot grad student is THE goal this year
Well, I'm most mad that he lied to you (about being married)...but the CAT THING IS A CLOSE SECOND
I think I've had more sex in your bed than you have and I've only been here three days
Idk I think he's weird but he's also from Wisconsin so that might have something to do with it.
He walked into me masturbating to a framed picture of Bill Murray riding a t-rex
Randomize
